I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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