Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
My feet surprised me
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