Duck Duck Cougar?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize