HIV tests are more positive than that guy
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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