This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
