If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
