Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Randomize
