i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
