I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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