when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
