No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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