Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
