If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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