:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
