It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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