I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Randomize
