so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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