Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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