I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Randomize
