I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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