Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
