Tell her she can't have a vagina
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
