So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
