It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
