Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
