He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
