they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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