Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Are my feet made of real feet?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
