Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Vodka?
Forever.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
