we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
