why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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