Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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