The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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