Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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