Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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