8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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