I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
