i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Im part way to drunk.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
