i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
