I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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