New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
