Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Randomize