i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
She made me pour olive oil on her.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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