New invention idea: vibrating tampons
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
