I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize