I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize