I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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