My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Farmville is her only friend.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
