When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize