i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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